I came down stairs into the
kitchen, as I turned around, it changed
shape, quickly to a triangle. I was shocked that a small blob could change its
shape into anything. I was experimenting, I was turning around each time. The
blob changed its shape. I thought, “how can that be possible” but then I said “it
was science” that was the only way an object can do such a thing. “It was a scientific
discovery” I said, I called my boss, and told him about this new discovery, “that
if you turn around for just a second this blob can change its shape to something.”
You have a interesting story but in your first sentence down stairs counts as one word. When your blob changed into a triangle I don't think you need the word quickly in there and I also don't fully think the 'I was turning around each time' part should be phrased like that. Maybe change it to something like 'I was experimenting and each time I turned around the blob changed shape."
ReplyDeleteThe sentence after that 'how can that be possible' needs to have a capital letter at the beginning.